Messed up “Date”

So a quick update into my life.

Nothing much going on. Went on a “date” Friday, it wasn’t one for me but apparently it was on for the guy. I was going in hoping to make a good friend in the area. He’s 34 Korean age and 33 by our normal standards. Barely taller and yeah…

 Anyways, he was another teacher around here from another school. I’m going to be completely honest, he wasn’t my type whatsoever.

I saw him before he saw me while I was on the bus.

There was nothing attracting me to him, not the eyes, nose, body, voice, nothing. Which made it even better if he was a friend because no attraction would happen, at least from my end.

He wanted to meet to drink. That was already a huge “yeah this is not a good start.” It wasn’t even 5pm good and and he wanted to drink Soju. I’m not a Soju girl especially the original non-flavored ones, I only tolerate it when I’m out with co-workers. 

Anyways, we sat down, he ordered and started talking about a ton of crap. How he had “African-American” friends and blah blah blah. Then, how they were good friends but some things they did he didn’t agree with. Like how they did drugs and other activities if you know what I mean. He also gave off this weird nervous energy which made me uncomfortable. In between talking he kept saying, “Please don’t hit me, or kick me, nor bite me.” I was like what kind of friends do you hang out around? None of that is my style and for you to keep saying it, is frustrating.

He went on to say how those friends made him think about “African Americans” in a certain light. Then, went on to say all the Americans he met no matter the race seemed to be the same way. It’s like if you already think that we all are pretty bad or the same why are you bothering me and telling me what they have done? I’m not like them. No one is completely the same, no matter if they have the same skin color or come from the same country. That’s like me saying all Korean guys are super rich, go for the broke girls in school against their parents’ wishes, have some slight anger issues, tend to get drunk off soju while eating ramen, are drop dead gorgeous with bodies from the heavens (maybe with the help of surgery) and will shower a girl in all the gifts she wants. Ok, granted some guys are like that, but not all are.

Then, after like an hour or 2, he wanted to get something to eat. He kept trying to get me to cook for him. Nah, homie it doesn’t work that way. Definitely not coming to my place unless you wanna get knocked out with a brick or something because I know what you are thinking about doing. He literally tried for 45 minutes to convince me to cook for him and such. Not happening. Ever. We are going to eat Korean BBQ~

When we sat down I was like “Alright, we will eat this, I will pay if I have to. If you wanna drink you are paying for that.”

He put the meat on the grill in such a slow manner, I was like this man has no clue what he is doing. Which was true, he basically had no clue what he was doing. He continued talking about the other Americans he met, making me just question his own character. Talking about he learned how to play basketball and rap. I can care less about basketball and if you can rap. That’s not going to impress me one bit. 

He ordered more soju and wanted to play a game of asking questions and if you can’t answer it you have to drink. If you can’t think of a question, you have to drink. He thought I was stupid and didn’t realize he was trying to get me drunk to the point he can basically get what he wants. Once again, nope. He also was pouring more into my shot glass than into his. So, each time he did that I made him drink another shot. He asked a ton of inappropriate questions in which they were easy for me to answer because well I haven’t done anything. Which allowed me to ask the questions right back and find out all the crap he has done. More soju shots later he was still getting on my nerves. 

Funniest part is that even though I was already tipsy by this point (super rare for me), I still knew what was going on, where I was, how to walk and such. He started asking more stupid questions like “What makes you attracted to a guy?”

I knew where he was heading with this, but my answer was honest. It depends on each guy. It’s never the same stuff. Granted their height (have to be taller, I realize I can’t really settle on that) and build plays a factor but again it depends on the guy. Sometimes it’s the eyes, or smile. If they have a wonderful voice that can get me. If they have interesting hobbies that’s something that sometimes gets me. Aside from that we need to get along in general. What gets me the most is being able to have a decent conversation one on one without any interruptions. No phones, nothing just us where we can talk about random things without it leading to a sexual topic. If you can’t hold a conversation without it going there, I see no point in talking to you. You should be able to hold a conversation with a person without that coming up within 10 minutes.

I also have this thing, if I first meet you and I just sit there waiting for you to make the first move or we will never have a conversation more than likely I’m not into you. Even more so if you start the conversation and I’m still pretty quiet, like answering the question and leaving it there with no explanations or anything. There’s a 99.99999999% chance that I’m not into you. 

The reason why I’m like that is because I tend to get this I guess “vibe” from people. I have to trust my gut instinct, it normally doesn’t guide me into dangerous territories. Once I instantly get that feeling something isn’t right, I try to keep a distance. I have learned in the past not to go “Oh maybe the feeling isn’t right this time, don’t judge a book by its cover and yada yada yada.” Yeah no, I end up getting hurt or something by ignoring it. So, that feeling is telling me to stay away from someone that doesn’t mean me well and I should listen to it if I want to avoid all that.

Now, back to the story,

He asked if what a guy did in college attracts me to a guy. Once again, it depends most of the time, nope. That was college. He went to Yonsei University. I was like “Oh, nice school”

He asked if that impressed me because he was smart. Then, went on for 10 minutes about how smart he is. How he went to a SKY University, and how a lot of people can’t go to them. Yes, that totally impressed me. Completely. I went to one also. Yay for us both. 

I was like “Yeah…remember I said I studied here a couple years ago, it was at Korea University, yes the rival. I majored in International Studies, you know politics. Did income taxes as a hobby since I was 10 and love to draft blueprints of houses in my free time. So, I might be smart too. Just maybe.” 

That facial expression of his was the best.

Later he asked what I wanted to do after eating. I told him I’m going home and he’s going where ever he needs to go. I like being home by a certain time. 

He went on to say “I’m kind of tired, can I stay at your place. I won’t do anything, but with me getting older and such.”

I told him, “No, I told you before you are not coming to my place at all. Ever. If you get tired so easily you should have gone home instead of staying out and drinking. That’s your fault, I’m not here to help you out in any way. You are a grown man, deal with it.”

He kept trying to convince me and I kept telling him no. Like if you are so smart you would understand the simple to letters N and O put together in that order means No 아니요~ 

He was caught off guard a bit but even better was…

My favorite question of the night:

“Are you attracted to the man across from you?” 

My answer?

 “Nope, not one bit. I wasn’t when I first saw you and now? After 2…3 bottles of soju. Hmmm…Nope still not even a tiny bit.”

I asked if he was ready to go because we were done eating and such. He said yeah and that he would pay. once we walked outside he once again tried to talk me into what he was thinking. Talking about “How about I walk you home and talk.”

I stopped walking, grabbed him by the shoulders looking at him and said “Dude, you are not that bright. When a girl says no, she means no. When a girl says she’s not that type of girl for the past 4 hours and has not shown you any difference you shouldn’t be acting like she’s some easy target to get.I get that you think all foreign girls are easy. I told you multiple times I’m not like that and I never will be. You are not going to magically change my mind. When someone says they are not attracted to you one bit even after drinking a ton of soju in which most people start to make questionable choices, you should know that you have no chance with them. *wags finger* tsk tsk Once again, I am going home alone. You are going to your home where ever that is. You know how to get home right? You’re old enough. Thanks for dinner and the drinks. Bye~” I waved with one hand and patted him on the shoulder before turning around, plugging in earbuds and walking home. 

Didn’t even glance back. Maybe 2 minutes later he sent a message saying that I probably didn’t want to see him again. That I shouldn’t worry, he won’t show up in front of me. That it seems I don’t trust him and because of that there cannot be any chemistry. Blah blah blah and that he regretted meeting me.

I just went “Yeah, of course I don’t trust you. You don’t give 100% trust blindly to people. And yeah no chemistry because I was never attracted to you the way you are to me. So, bye~”

I deleted and blocked him before I even got half way home.

Never been so tipsy or drunk in my life. Whatever it was. I already had a headache since the day before. The only thing soju did was make it easier for me to go to sleep. Still woke up a few hours later like normal and then was up around 5:30 on a Saturday like always.

Couldn’t even get wasted properly. tsk

Oh well, the end.

Until next time~ which is soon. I know some questions are popping up in your heads.