Why? The age..ugh

I know all of you well maybe like 2 of you, are probably like “WHAT IS GOING ON?!”

I am too. Trust me, I’m wondering that more and more everyday.

This is going to be about a guy.

Not Mr. Military, he screwed up big time. So nothing is coming from that ever. Forever friend-zoned if you will. He had a chance but messed it up to a point I just can’t see him that way again. The sadness. He had potential. Wonderful potential too. *sigh* Talking to one of my best friends over the weekend made me realize even more that I can’t do anything with him after what I found out.

Bleh. But life shall go on~!

Plus I just know somewhere out there is a wonderful guy for me. Someone like *coughs* Jaejoong. >.> <.<

Anyways…

This is about a guy I’ve known for over a year. We are friends though I know he wants more. I would but I can’t. Why?

*sigh* just my luck he’s too young. He’s legal. But it’s just odd for me. Like I…it’s against the few standards I do have. I date guys older than me. I’ve thought about the exception of maybe a year or 2 younger depends on how they act. But he’s beyond that.

Wait for it…

wait…

…..

…..

……..

6 years.

6 freaking years. He’s younger than my sister by 5 months. I just…no nope no…Not even in his 20s yet. Almost but not. Good grief. I’m dying thinking about it.

What makes it even worse, he’s a great guy. Like if he was the right age, I’d date him in a heartbeat. No doubt about it. Which is odd for me to say.

What has happened to me?

He’s smart, caring, can cook, great sense of humor, mature (in a sense), he’s there when I need him, I feel comfortable around him, he’s a decent height and built. Like I can chill and be myself around him with makeup or not without any worrying. Heck I remember when we first met and it was hot. I sweat instantly and he was totally fine with it. He knows about my undying love for Jaejoong. I can open up and talk to him about anything without feeling like I’ve talked too much. We can sit there in comfortable silence too.

He just gets who I am.

That’s not an easy thing for most.

BUT, the closer he tried to get the more I pulled away. To the point I cut him off because I just couldn’t return his feelings. I didn’t want to hurt him, so I thought it would be best if we didn’t talk at all. That way he could find someone else to like or whatever. He respected that for the most part.

Flash forward basically a year. He sent me a message saying how he knew I didn’t want to be bothered, but he really missed me and he wasn’t going to give up. I was all O.o like dude you are in college, there are tons of younger females around, some older ones too but not like 6 years older but you know older, people that can relate to you more, go have fun. Don’t come after noona. This noona is boring and has some issues. Go get a gorgeous Korean girl or foreign since that seems to be your thing.

Sorry I just had to laugh at myself.

Note: Noona/Nuna (누나) is a Korean term males use for a female that’s older than them like a sister or friend.

Anyways, did that turn him away?

Nope. Not one bit.

He waited a YEAR. Dated no one, focused on school, started going to the gym, and learned how to cook some dishes. Through it all he still thought about me.

WHY?! 

He makes me want to cry. Feels like I’m watching a Korean drama and I’m yelling at the main girl to give the poor boy a chance, he waited a year. Not a month or two. An entire year. Who waits a year for someone you aren’t in a relationship with? Especially someone who kept pushing you away every time you tried.

Sadly I’m that main girl and I’m all “No…I can’t. Just because. The age! What will people think?”

Like that’s a good reason.

Curse this kid.

When I was sick last week he decided without me asking or anything he was going to come out when he didn’t have classes just to check on me. That’s not a 20 minute ride, not even 40 minutes. It takes over an hour for him to get to me. If he’s coming from his campus over 2 hours. As soon as he knew he made the decision to meet me once I finished work.. I couldn’t talk him out of it. Like who does that?

He even remembered where I lived perfectly.

He’s been there once before.

He made sure I ate and was ok. We watched TV and just talked about any and everything. Talked so much I didn’t realize the time fly by. He stayed over since he didn’t have classes the next day and wanted to make sure nothing happened. He respected my space completely and didn’t try anything out of the way. Complete gentleman. He slept on the floor and didn’t try anything.

Ugh…*sighs* >.<

His parents taught him well. Very well.

In all honesty you’d think he was way older than he is. Heck he acts more mature than Mr. Military in a way. He keeps communication open and he’s honest. No games. All of you should know by now, how much that means to me.

Though I found out his dad is the youngest of 10 kids. O.o TEN kids. My goodness. That’s not really common here. The only other family I know that huge here is Jaejoong’s with his 8 sisters and like 2 half-siblings.

I had to laugh though because my dad has a lot of siblings too. Only thing my dad is one of the older ones.

Back to the topic.

He remembers the small things that I have talked about in the past. Like my love for cherry blossoms. Yet, I haven’t gone to see them yet. Like I’ve seen cherry blossoms plenty of times but not in the areas they have for cherry blossom viewing. He was all “Let’s go see them one weekend.” He even remembered how I want to travel around Asia some. Like this kid. *covers face* He’s going to be the end of me.

I’m so tempted to say “Screw it, let’s see where it goes.”

But I just can’t. Bleh.

Until next time~